Top Tweets - Lance Armstrong Calls It Quits

I can't pretend to know the truth about the doping accusations against 7-time Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong.

According to the US Anti-Doping Agency, the evidence against Armstrong is overwhelming, and the cyclist is giving up the fight against the allegations to avoid the awful embarrassment of the truth.

In a statement released by Armstrong, he characterizes the entire USADA investigation as an unfair witch hunt, and says he will no longer fight the charges because "enough is enough."

When I can't decide where the truth lies in a public dispute such as this, I do the only thing I can. I turn to Twitter for perspective. And, jokes.

Life on Mars - Top Tweets From Curiosity

Mars rover Curiosity

I bet you didn't know NASA's adventurous space-traveling rover Curiosity had its on Twitter account.

It's true, and even more interesting, Curiosity is kind of....bitter ....jaded... snarky, even.

I started following @SarcasticRover today on Twitter, and I have to say that is one damn funny robot.

I've culled the most recent communications from Curiosity and picked out a few favorites, but those of you on Twitter might want to give the poor rover a "follow." Really, you should. It's lonely out in space.

Top Tweets - Breaking Up With Chick-Fil-A

I love Chick-Fil-A sandwiches so much it's sinful.

Not like you love your spouse, and not the way you love your friends or family. I mean...it's more than that.

I'm talking about an intense fiery burning love. A deep unfathomable love, the kind of love that literally grafts itself on to your heart. Immaculate, unshakeable, preternatural love. 

I love Chick-Fil-A sandwiches like Westboro Baptist loves hate, like Kardashians love the NBA, like Rush Limbaugh loves the sound of his own voice.

I love those buttery buns and peppery chicken filets (and on occasion those fried-to-perfection 12-piece nuggets with honey mustard dipping sauce) so much it hurts. Like kittens love catnip, like flowers love rain, like God so loved the world. That's how much.

And that's why breaking up with Chick-Fil-A is hard to do (congrats Neil Sedaka - you were right).

In light of remarks made by Chick-Fil-A president Dan Cathy this week, I can no longer stick my head in the sand. I must acknowledge that some of the money I spend at Chick-Fil-A supports people and organizations who believe I am less.

I must say goodbye, Chick-Fil-A. So long my beautiful sandwich, I'll miss you.

In these first difficult days after my split from Chick-Fil-A, I know Twitter will be there to comfort me and make me smile. Here are a few favorite Tweets so far.

Top Tweets About the Boy Scouts Ban on Gays

In a prior post, I shared news of the Boy Scouts of America's decision to continue its shameful ban on participation by gay scouts and scoutmasters.

It's important that the Boy Scouts organization begins to understand how outdated and wrong-headed their bigoted policy is. To that end, the Twitterverse launched a full-frontal attack on the BSA with all the verve and creativity we've come to expect.

Here are a few of my favorite Boy Scout Tweets, which I selected mostly for boldness of message or cleverness of irony. (Please know, I'm not trivializing the BSA's decision - I'm calling attention to it and recognizing good humor!)