Friday, January 20, 2012

Newt Balks at Public Scrutiny of Private Affairs

Newt Gingrich is righteously indignant because the media has focused on something as intensely personal as his serial infidelity and his second wife's recent claim that he asked her for an "open marriage." In this clip from the presidential debate in South Carolina, Gingrich expresses his outrage at being asked about his ex-wife's allegation.

Gingrich is absolutely right; his desire to enjoy women other than his wife is no one's business but his. And his wife's. And the other women he chooses to bring into his marriage. And their husbands, if they happen to be married too.

Really, who are we to sit in judgment? Even if the Speaker chose to engage in Fundamentalist LDS-style plural marriage, where he and his wives and dozens of kids live together on a secret Colorado compound, or maybe have separate houses like Bill Pullman's wives on Big Love, is that really our business?

I mean, if Newt Gingrich wants to have a Hugh Hefner harem of hot little bunnies, who sit around naked in hot tubs, drinking champagne and kissing each other all over, should we care? Not as long as they are all women of legal age!

What if Newt wants to invite some friendly neighborhood pets into his marriage bed? Should we really judge him so long as the animals are consenting? Really, who doesn't love dogs? Leave this poor guy alone!

The intimate details of Newt's personal life are simply not appropriate for media scrutiny, and who Gingrich or any man loves in the privacy of his own home, should never be the subject of public debate.

Well, almost never. I mean, if we are talking about two people of the same gender having a relationship, that's different. Then we should pry and judge and make high moral pronouncements, and maybe even create laws against it. Right, Newt?

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