Monday, September 5, 2011

Rafa Nadal's Press Conference Collapse Serves as Model for Obama

Yesterday I witnessed one of the more surreal moments I can recall in recent professional sports history. Rafael Nadal, the #2 ranked tennis player in the world and defending US Open champion, suffered severe and incapacitating leg cramps during a press conference. After several uncomfortable moments of quiet wincing and squirming, Nadal eventually slid out of his chair, under the desk, and on to the floor. 


As I watched the bizarre event unfold and saw Nadal grimace in sheer agony, several thoughts crossed my mind. First, why doesn't he say something? (Like, "it's okay everyone, just a leg cramp."). Second, why doesn't someone approach to offer help? This goes on for 2 excruciating minutes! (Don't his manager and agent attend his press conferences?)

Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning - this is exactly the tactic President Obama should employ this week in his upcoming "jobs" speech. Let's face it, there really are no easy (and readily acceptable) solutions to the job crisis or someone would already have implemented them. So, instead of sitting behind the Oval Office desk and pretending he has new information or viable ideas to reverse our economic slump, he should just feign an absolutely debilitating leg cramp.

As the President slowly loses his focus and then writhes in imaginary anguish, we will all be so distracted and concerned that we will simply forget about the horrid condition of the nation's economy. We'll all feel an overwhelming flood of sympathy for our tortured Commander-in-Chief, and his approval ratings will rise correspondingly. In the unlikely event that the positive impact of this Presidential collapse is short-lived, the White House can simply re-ignite our sympathies next year by having the President throw up during a United Nations address or maybe tear an ACL during the State of the Union address.

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