Forgiving a Serial Killer (And Saving Yourself)

Linda Rule, 1966-1982

I can think of nothing more cruel in this world than having your child brutally raped and murdered.

Robert Rule doesn't have to wonder how that might feel - he is the father of Linda Rule, a sixteen year-old girl who was a victim of Green River serial killer Gary Ridgway. 

At Ridgway's trial, after he was convicted of murdering 49 women, Mr. Rule and family members of other victims were given the opportunity to address the killer directly.

Understandably, the suffering and anguish of those who lost loved ones was clearly on display, as one family member after another wished a painful death on Ridgway and assured the killer that an eternity in Hell awaited him.

The rape and murder of a child is an event of such horrific magnitude and power that it would surely shatter any parent, leaving them broken, bitter, and empty - with a life in ruins.

It's hard to imagine anything strong enough to heal that kind of wound. How could anyone move forward from that kind of awful destructive grief? How could you fight such permanent darkness?

Apparently, there is a way.

It's an unthinkably difficult path that perhaps runs counter to our most fundamental instincts - but it's probably the only way out, and when Robert Rule spoke to Gary Ridgway, he illuminated it brilliantly.

I have never seen the power of forgiveness and human kindness so simply and honestly displayed.

Turn of Phrase - A Mother's Love for a Murderer

Clothing designer
and murderer,
Jeffrey Johnson

"I don’t blame police in New York for shooting my son because he killed somebody, but for me, he hasn’t changed. 

He’s still the kindhearted, caring person who loved all kinds of animals and I’m sure he loved us. 

You know a mother always tries to look for the best in you."

- From the mother of Jeffrey Johnson, after learning her son murdered a co-worker last week in midtown Manhattan. In a subsequent showdown with police, Johnson was shot and killed on the sidewalk in front of the Empire State Building.

So many people were physically or emotionally injured or destroyed in this single incident - Steven Ercolino (the 41 year-old murder victim), his grieving family, the 9 pedestrians who all survived but were hit by stray bullets during the shootout, the police officers who were involved, and of course Jeffrey Johnson.

There's so much more to a news story than we get in the headlines and initial reporting. In America, our attention span is short and we move on quickly to the next big thing, seldom taking time to consider the enormous ripple effect of events like this. For me, Jeffrey Johnson's mother provides a poignant reminder.